Freedom From Judgement

In Matthew 7 Jesus kicks off his warnings about judgment with the words, “Do not judge, so that you may not be judged.” He then goes on to warn about seeing specks in your neighbor’s eye while ignoring the log in your own. Through the years, I’ve understood this in various layers. Jesus often talks about life being reciprocal. We will be forgiven as we forgive, we receive when we cast our bread upon the water, do unto others and more. So, it immediately makes sense that we will be judged by how we judge.

I believe in this principle and as a supernaturalist I recognize it in my own life. Instant karma as it were. My actions seem to boomerang. When I give freely, I seem to receive more freely. When I cut corners with someone, I end up losing those gains later. Yet I’m unclear why some of the most judgmental people in the world seem to be so successful right now. The more traditional among you might say this is because we’re talking about God’s ultimate judgement here. It happens after you die, or maybe at the end of time. Fine.

Recently I stumbled upon an interview with Richard Rohr that made me see this in a more contemplative light. Rohr believes that Jesus is not just cautioning against external actions and criticisms, moreover he is calling us to examine our own dualistic view of the world. Nonjudgement is a lens with which we should see the world. Certainly, judgement is a sword that unfairly cuts others, but we cut ourselves with the other edge at the same time. I believe there is a divine order of reciprocity at work in the universe. But the worst effect of judgement is not about losing God’s grace or suffering cosmic accountability. It becomes the measure of how evaluate ourselves as well.

We need what Rohr calls, “a new operating system,” for our minds. Everything we do seems to call out for our judgment. Many of our careers require us to make judgements every day so we’re training ourselves for other parts of our lives. Our friends and family disappoint us, so we get angry instead of trying to observe and understand the circumstances first. Most of all, we disappoint ourselves when we make comparisons to others instead of just accepting ourselves as we are. We’re conditioned by our world to judge. We’re stuck. Honestly, many of us believe it’s the only way to think.

Jesus is doing more than calling out our judgmental actions, He is addressing our judgmental minds. Our culture’s constant preoccupation with endless measuring and comparing and competing leads to great unhappiness. Social media drives a lot of this unhappiness and little of it is real. Our vision is flooded by phony Instagram filters, influencers in rented Ferraris, humble-brags about vacations and job promotions and it feels like we’re not keeping up. Judgment keeps us focused on these false narratives, this physical idolatry, and it prevents us from any mystical or transcendent experience we should be having instead. Material success doesn’t lead to happiness, we bring happiness with us despite what else is in the room.

Of course, our addiction to judgement is driven by more than social media. We live in a politically polarized world where our rights and freedoms are being challenged daily. We’re facing greater economic instability than many of us have ever seen in our lifetimes, so how can we not be drenched in fear and uncertainty? Fear leads to tribal associations that in turn lead to more judgements because my tribe is better, purer, smarter and my tribe will save you. We’re told that empathy is wrong, thus judgement of others is right. Our culture demands an external scorecard where we value ourselves on our own material achievements and outward views of success.

We short circuit this with prayer. I don’t mean what most people mean when they say, “prayer,” which is often just asking for God to dispense from some divine vending machine. I mean changing your way of seeing. I often pray petitionary prayer as well; I’m not criticizing anyone who does. It’s an important step in our relationship with God to bring up our concerns directly, to understand ourselves and seek more alignment. It’s important to pray for and with others, not because together we can bully God into action, but because we can be unified in our love. But I’m talking about something much more profound, which is what I believe Jesus and Paul are suggesting when they talk about prayer. Prayer is a way of being and seeing, not just words spoken aloud.

When you practice contemplative prayer, you are simply waiting for God. Of course, many thoughts come up while you’re waiting – things you want to happen, things you don’t want to happen, and of course lots of things that are in your plans which will interrupt your ability to hear God’s will. So, in the practice you learn to recognize thoughts as just things that float through your brain and you can do whatever you want with them, including ignore them. You are not your thoughts. You are not even your brain. A big part of these interfering thoughts are comparisons, competitive urges to get ahead, judgement of yourself and others, labels and analysis. In contemplation we learn to see these as just mental objects floating around, not reality and not related to our own self-identity.

Contemplation strips away judgment and transforms our thinking away from our ego. The ego craves control most often through separation and categorization. What is good, what is bad, what is worthy, what is unworthy, what is right, what is wrong? It attaches us to our preexisting beliefs, and it makes us mistake our judgements for ultimate truth. We are born into a broken world and our ego reacts to this brokenness as best it can, trying to tame the chaos through security, esteem, dominance, control, power and tribal loyalty. These attachments emphasize our separation from God and each other. Imposing order through judgement is an illusion. We judge for greater fragmentation instead of accepting the wholeness all-in-all in God’s grace.

Contemplative prayer helps us give up the judgmental lens. We can stop tying our self-worth to external circumstances and embrace our deeper, stable and ever-present connection with God. When we apply judgement, we color our world with our own ego instead of seeing people and situations as they truly are. Prayer helps us break away from those knee jerk reactions that cloud real awareness. This leads to greater love and compassion for others. Now it’s great to take Jesus’ words as simple cautions against judging others. But when you let go of judgement on this deep, egocentric level, you cultivate a more natural empathy. You see the divine in others and the world around you.  You then remember your own unity with the divine. God is already every present, you are already in Christ, God is on your side forever so there is no need to worry yourself with comparisons and judgement.

Judgement itself is the boomerang, the instant karma. Letting go, surrendering control to trust in God gives us real peace. You don’t need to understand and control everything. You need to be the you that God created and called good.